The Red Shirt The Captain Insisted On Wearing
Sometimes, as a leader, you have to hide your doubts…
…something this captain knows all too well.
A ship was sailing in a dangerous part of the sea. The captain saw a pirate ship approaching his ship.
The captain shouted to his crew, “Gentlemen, bring me my red shirt!”
The crew brought him his red shirt, he put it on, and led his men into battle. They lost one man, but all in all it was a great victory. Everyone wonders what the red shirt is, but they just shrug their shoulders.
A few days later, the captain sees two pirate ships in the distance.
He calls out again, “Men, bring me my red shirt!”
The crew does so and they fight the pirates. This time they lose a few more men, but at least most of them are unharmed.
This time, however, curiosity gets the better of them and they ask the captain why he asked for his red shirt during the battles.
To which he replies: “Crew, I know you all rely on me for support and morale, I knew I was likely to be wounded and I didn’t want you to see me bleeding and fear that all was lost, so I wore a red shirt so that my wounds would blend into my shirt”.
A few weeks later, the ship is sailing on another sea, and suddenly 10 fearsome pirate ships appear in the distance.
The captain sees them and shouts, “Gentlemen, bring me my brown pants!”
They Say Men Don’t Listen To Women
A man asked his wife what she wanted for her 40th birthday.
“I’d like to be six again,” she replied.
On the morning of her birthday, he woke her up early and they went to a local amusement park.
What a day! He took her on every ride in the park: Death Slide, Scream Loop, Wall of Horror, everything! Wow!
Five hours later, dizzy and sick to his stomach, he staggered out of the amusement park.
They went straight to McDonald’s and her husband ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake.
Then they went to the movies – it was the latest Disney movie and what an amazing adventure!
Finally, she returned home with her husband and collapsed on the bed.
Her husband leaned over and asked her affectionately: “So, honey, what was it like to be six years old again?”
The woman looked up wearily and said;
“You fool, I meant my dress size.”
The moral of the story is this:
If a woman speaks and a man is really listening, he will still misunderstand.